1, 2 or 3: Which type of parakeet are you?
This will help you recognise how you feel about poultry. But beware: this text is teeming with prejudice and sarcasm.
People and pets are always one of those things. Some people love them, others think to themselves: "How can you?". I had the same experience when I was sending out important (in my world) nymphet parakeet news every hour, such as "Cookie sleeps.", "Rio eats." and "Aren't they cute? Sigh. Triple heart huggy things." bombarded.
I quickly realised that not everyone is as enthusiastic about feathered fowl as I am. And since life is easier when you categorise people, that's exactly what I did. The result: a parakeet typology - from "Want too!" to "Get away from me with the poultry!"
Of course, this typology is to be read with a wink and has no scientific basis whatsoever. Just to let you know, so that no one feels like they've stepped on my tail feathers - sorry, feet.
Type 1: Nymphies? Awww, wants a cuddle!
Let's move on to my favourite type: the parakeet fan. (After all, I'm one too.) This person is characterised by the fact that he or she gets that rapturous grin at the sight of feathery photos that others only get with babies. The eyes get big and shiny, the corners of the mouth involuntarily pull upwards and the first sentence is: "Can I visit the nymphies and stroke them?".
Accordingly, this species of human is always concerned about the physical well-being of the parakeets and brings a big bag of millet with them on their first visit, which is of course served by hand.
Type 2: Nymphies? Nice to have, but not for me
Type 2 is more sober than type 1, but not as dismissive as type 3, which I describe below. My friend Tina, for example, is type 2. She likes to listen to my parakeet stories and still puts the brakes on me if I talk too much about my bonnets. Then she elegantly changes the topic.
In general, type 2 people have the following attitude towards pets: If you want to keep some, go for it. As long as the pets don't live in your home and make a mess, it's all good. Taking care of the animals for a short time while the owner is on holiday is not a problem. But then type 2 is also happy to have his four walls to himself or only have to share them with Homo sapiens.
He or she would probably enjoy a fluffy parrot.
Type 3: Nymphies? Help, they're biting me!
Type 3 is plagued by a deep-seated fear: that birds could fly onto their head and bite them. He likes to panic and throw around lines such as "Alfred Hitchcock didn't make "The Birds" as a horror film for nothing" and "Oh God, they're flying around! Then they can pluck my hair out with their pointy beaks!"
This guy has probably seen too many films or is really worried about his dwindling hair anyway. You don't have to get through to him with cute parakeet stuff, because his panic means you won't get through to him anyway.
Type 3 is more interested in things that he can control better than wilful birds - such as books. How convenient that we also sell books about parrots.
P.S.: If you read my cockatiel articles regularly, you may have noticed that there are suddenly three nymphies in the large photo above. Reason: Rio and Cookie have got reinforcements. The parakeet lady Pebbles with the red cheeks now lives with them and completes the boys' flat share.
What type of parakeet are you?
- Type 1: Awww, wants to cuddle!46%
- Type 2: Nice to have, but not for me38%
- Type 3: Help, they're biting me!4%
- Just want to check the answers.13%
The competition has ended.
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Anika Schulz
Teamleader Editorial
Anika.Schulz@galaxus.deAs a child, I was socialised with Mario Kart on SNES before ending up in journalism after graduating from high school. As a team leader at Galaxus, I'm responsible for news. I'm also a trekkie and an engineer.
